Just like that…
by Cetta on January 26th, 2012
So. I was going to write today about my hair (fascinating) and crocheting and gluten-free and then we found out that the power plant in which Dave has spent 27 years of his life will be closed by September. And just like that, our world has been upended. At almost 52, he doesn’t qualify for the buy-out/pension package being offered to those 55 and over. We may get lucky and he may get a job within the company at some other facility, or we may be told that we’d have to move hundreds of miles away if he wants to keep a job with them. WTF?
Like I told him, my first concern is Melody. I can’t imagine what moving and starting a new school and being away from everyone and everything familiar would do to her anxiety levels. Next, of course, I worry about keeping a roof over our heads and food in our mouths. Right up there is medical insurance. Between us, we take probably 25 different prescriptions. I’m not even kidding. And my Remicade treatments? $16,000 a pop. Even with our insurance – which takes a healthy junk of Dave’s paycheck – we paid over $6,000 out of pocket last year.
Ugh. What a frickin’ mess. All told, over 500 people will be losing their jobs as First Energy closes 7 of their coal-fired power plants.
So. That’s my day so far. I did take a picture of the mammoth blanket I’ve been working on here and there:
I hope you’re having a better day.
It’s my hair, anyway
by Cetta on January 23rd, 2012
I spent this afternoon at my son’s house, waiting for the Time W@rner idiots to come. His internet has been crappy since it was hooked up last week, so he made an appointment “between 12 and 2.” At 2:30 he called to see why they hadn’t been there and was told it had been cancelled. Whatever. I futzed around with his modem and router and laptop and Megan’s Macbook (which is the first I’ve ever played with!) and somehow got it all working. Go, me! And knock wood it stays on.
While there, I finally finished Storm of Swords and will say DAMN! This book was a crazy roller coaster of stories of life, death, marriage, war… you name it. For the first half (it’s huge, btw, HUGE – 1216 pages, according to Amazon) I thought it dragged, but I’d say it picked up considerably around the 60% mark (for you Kindle readers). And the ending? It left me wanting to read more, which is good, since I already got the next book, A Feast for Crows (which says it’s 694 pages. Slacker.)
I’m thinking of trying to get back to my quasi-natural color in an effort to eventually stop coloring my hair completely. I’m about 3 weeks overdue for a color, and clearly have some thinking to do about this:
See? I’m thinking that I kind of like the gray/white. I’m going to ask my stylist her opinion tomorrow. Maybe move away from the reddish tones and back to the dark brown, before letting it grow in in increments. Hell, I don’t know. I just know it costs too much to keep trying to hide the gray that I don’t really care to hide anyway. My sister-in-law thinks I’ll look old (hmmph!) but you know? I’m not so worried about that. I figure I could always cover it up again if it’s awful. I started thinking about this and do you know that I can only think of 3 women in my family (both sides!) who let their gray show. This could be why my mother was horrified when I mentioned it. Heh.
Still gluten-free, mostly. On Sundays I let myself have gluten and I can definitely tell on Mondays. Now I’ve got to start eating better in general.
(This next section will be about Melody and her anxiety, so feel free to skim if you’re not interested)
We saw Melody’s therapist Saturday – as I mentioned before, we are using Cognitive Behavioral Therapy as a base for dealing with some of her anxiety and OCD issues. We’ve been seeing her since September, I think, and some of the methods she has taught Melody to deal with her anxieties have been very helpful and I fully intend to continue this course. Her recent full-blown panic attacks worried me enough, though, to finally consider having her see the child psychiatrist on staff there. Since about the second visit, I think, the therapist has said that she thought Melody would benefit from medications, but like most parents (I hope) I am very leery of introducing these drugs at such a young age. Anyway, I called Louise (the therapist) after the ER incident and she told me that although she thought the psychiatrist wasn’t taking on new cases, she’d discuss her case with him and maybe get the name of someone. Luckily, he decided he’d see her. Of course, melody is already upset at the thought of seeing someone else AND that he’s a man…but Louise took her into his office Saturday to show her that it wasn’t a medical doctor-type office and told her what to expect, etc. She also told me that they do make meds in liquid form because you know there’s no way my child is going to swallow a pill. Please. And gawd help us if they offer her anything grape flavored (anyone want a bunch of grape Flintstone vitamins? Heh). But I digress…
We went into the session with her this weekend because I wanted to be sure to get across what was happening, and because Dave was able to come with and wanted to hear what she had to say. Melody is never talkative or what I’d call “open” but she has gone into the last two sessions on her own and that’s gone well, I think. Mainly, this CBT gives her tools to use when she feels the anxiety coming on. This is rough, you guys, because I’ve never really dealt with it. I’ve had a few panic attacks in my life, but usually they’ve been brought on by claustrophobic feelings. Melody’s can be triggered by anything: it’s 9:30 and she’ll never sleep again. She has a pain in her side and what could it be? Everything escalates if not caught and nipped in the bud.
We attended her friend’s birthday party yesterday, which was like pulling teeth. She did participate in craft-making at stuff, but started asking about when we could leave shortly after arriving. Of course I felt we had to wait until after the opening of the gifts, so we were there 4 hours, I think. Immediately she wanted to leave – started getting herself worked up about not having enough time “to relax” before having to shower and such. By the time we got into the van she was on the edge of tears over everything.
It’s awful, seeing your child so upset. She wants to participate, but feels shy and awkward. She wants to eat at parties and such, but fears getting sick (I have no idea where this comes from). I vary between patience and anger. Sometimes it’s awfully difficult to hold my tongue.
Anyway, she did admit to having at least some fun.
Baby steps.
It’s a snowy Thursday…
by Cetta on January 19th, 2012
I am trying to post something every day, but sometimes the day gets away from me. With Dave’s PC in the shop (he has the only desktop), I’ve been letting Melody play on my laptop at night, doing her Club Penguin or poptropica or whatever she does while FaceTiming her BFF Ryann. This FaceTime thing… it’s like Ryann is here every day – which is fine because I like Ryann. It’s some of the other kids I’m not keen on because, see, Melody walks around with the thing and so whoever she’s talking to can see whatever is going on. Not that anything “goes on” that’s incriminating or anything. It just feels intrusive when it’s a kid I don’t care for or something — although I thought it was funny when she came over to show me my neighbor dancing around her living room (she was talking to her friend next door, who turned the ipod around so we could watch her mom dance).
Technologies. Heh.
Yesterday was one of my zero energy days in which I barely manage to get anything done. Today I gave the family room a thorough dust and vacuum. I wish we had hairless dogs. It’s winter! They should not be shedding this damned much! Since we had a pretty good snowstorm this afternoon I put off the grocery shopping another day. I hate grocery shopping, have I mentioned?
I’m still gluten-free. I slipped and had Pop Tarts (oh, shut up) and I definitely noticed, so back on the wagon. It’s not too bad. Tonight, for instance, I made sloppy joes and crumbled taco shells onto the meat for myself instead of having it on bread. Now I need to concentrate on cutting calories. Feh.
I know you all know by now that Heather and Jon of dooce are separated. Now, I used to read her way back in the day, when Mel was a toddler and Leta was a baby. Since Marlo was born, I check in occasionally. I don’t care one way or another about them – I mean, some people are so nasty in their hatred of the woman that it’s curious, you know? How can you hate someone on the internets SO MUCH? Just don’t read their damned blog! Problem solved! Anyway. I was saddened to see that they’d split because a) they have small children and b) divorce is usually a sad and drawn-out process. I was surprised and kind of shocked at the response on other websites, though. I guess this is why I can’t watch those train-wreck reality shows. I hate confrontation in general. I don’t even like it on the tv. I do not like to watch other people’s lives fall apart, no matter what kind of idiots they may be. It all makes me cringe. In fact, I saw a commercial today for some show called something like “trailer park to tiara.” This commercial featured southerners in “fancy” situations making fools of themselves. Cringe. What the hell makes people allow themselves to be shown in that kind of light? Money, yes, I know. Sigh.
What else did I want to vent about? Paula Deen. Now. I don’t watch cooking shows (unlike my daughter, Cailey, who LIVES for them), but of course I’m familiar with Paula Deen and her “needs more butter” type of cooking. And I DO watch chef-turned-travel-show-host Anthony Bourdain because a) he’s exactly the kind of snarky, bitchy kind of guy I would probably be friends with and b) I think he’s funny. I’ve heard of his disdain for Paula Deen and her kind of cooking. I even kind of agree with him that it’s smarmy and curious that Paula Deen would “announce” that she has diabetes while simultaneously being paid to hawk this new diabetes drug. BUT. That doesn’t mean I think it’s OK to make fun of her illness. Her choosing to reveal her illness is her business, and I don’t think it’s cool to “blame” her for “getting” diabetes because of the way she cooks.
Anyone else reading the Game of Thrones books? I know Aimee was on book 3, too…so, let me ask Aimee and anyone who has read book three (Storm of Swords): WTF? I’m about 70% through and without spoiling anything, let me say that I am surprised by the turns of events and the people who live/die/marry/etc in this book. I can’t tell yet if it’s a brilliant move or a sure way to make me angry. It’s definitely keeping me interested, though.
So CJ is all moved into his new house and I’m becoming used to the idea. He got his internets hooked up yesterday and the tv today, so I think they’re all set. I had to laugh when he let out a yelp upon opening his first gas bill (heh) because, yo, it’s just the beginning. Being responsible is a sucky, sucky business.
What a difference a day makes
by Cetta on January 17th, 2012
No more snow. Now the yard is a swamp, which makes for muddy paws. Of course, it’s supposed to freeze tonight… life in Cleveland.
Melody complained of a sore throat/headache all weekend. This morning, beginning at 6 AM, she was whining about her throat. She has no fever, but went into her panic mode at the prospect of school. Crying, hyperventilating, etc. Oh, this child. Dave gets upset and yells, but that doesn’t help. I knew from the get that this was a losing battle, so I gave her some Advil and told her she’d be in bed all day – until we have to go get her homework. I will then make her get dressed and drag her out with me because she will be doing her homework. She’s been in her room all morning, but has come out to ask for
- milk
- a pop tart
- raisins
- the computer (nope – not when you’re pretending to be sick, sorry)
I’m sure she’s in there writing a play which contains a particularly nasty scene involving my demise. (She writes stories when bored, you see.) Anyway, add this to the list of stuff to be addressed – again – in therapy this weekend.
Me, I’ve spent the morning reading A Storm of Swords (55%! I’ve passed the half-way mark!). I think maybe I’ll drag her to the library and to CJ’s, too. Why should my plans get canned because she didn’t want to go to school? Sure, I’ll have to deal with her litany of complaints (she hates running errands, of course) but, tough. I haven’t been over to CJ’s since they moved their stuff in, and he pitifully asked me for some olive oil yesterday (after seeing the cost at the store). Mom gets it by the gallon at the restaurant outlet store and gives it to me, so I have plenty to spare.
You know what show I love but no one seems to talk about? Supernatural. I know you Buffy/Angel guys must like it, right? The writing on the show continues to surprise me. It’s funny and smart. And supernatural! And Sam and Dean aren’t too hard to look at, either.
So I’m all caught up with the Downton Abbey – except for this week’s episode, which I’ll probably watch later. **SPOILER ALERT*** I could not believe that whole scene in which O’Brien leaves the soap where whatshername (Elizabeth Perkins) would slip on it and, of course, lose the baby! Ugh. What an awful thing. And I’m beginning to dislike this whole Matthew and Mary thing. And Bates! WTF? Poor Anna. OK. Enough…
I ordered the Letters of Anais Nin and Henry Miller on a whim this morning. I still have Amazon money and someone linked to a video of the two of them discussing diaries and…well, I’ve never read them and I feel like I should. So there’s that. Is there a classic or popular book that you’ve always meant to read but haven’t gotten around to it? There are so many, right? “So many books. So little time.” True, that.
Let’s do the mutterings, since it’s been a while:
I say … and you think … ?
- Red tape :: government
- Crush :: boys
- Magical :: twilight
- Sticky :: situation
- Tile :: shower
- Doubt :: reason
- Inconsistent :: statement
- Kiss :: lips
- Inspiration :: writing
- Thanks :: for the memories
Can’t complain…
by Cetta on January 16th, 2012
…but I still do. We got our first significant snowfall over the weekend.
I don’t know how much, really, but it’s close to a foot. Lots of drifting and what-not, since we get the winds off the lake and all. Blech. I do hate the snow.
We ventured out into it Saturday to visit one of Dave’s sisters. She works for the post office and doesn’t get home until 7:30, so I knew from the get-go that this was a risky proposition, given Melody’s need to be home by 9. Sure enough, she started wringing her hands and acting a fool before 9. This is one of those situations where I do my best to accommodate her “quirks” but am not always able to. She gets anxious, I get irritated and feel bad because I worry that she made her aunt and uncle feel like she didn’t want to see them, etc. Oy.
CJ is all moved out and officially living in sin (what? He’s the one who became Catholic – I’m simply pointing out what his church would think of this! Heh.) one town over. It’s silly that I have mixed emotions about this, I know. He was away at college, he lived in Italy for 6 months, he was going to move to SC for a year… but see, in all of those cases he was coming back. Now… he’s not. I’m proud of him for working so hard and wanting to be independent and all of that, and I think his girlfriend is a sweet girl and all, but he’s my baby. Doesn’t help that Dave’s sister was telling me how she never sees or hears from HER sons anymore. She even told me that she dropped by her son’s house one day, only to be turned away! Seems her daughter-in-law scolded her for not calling and said they were not ready for company! And she never let her in! AND, her son was home at the time! Oh. I told her that I can’t believe she didn’t rip into her son for a) not stepping in and b) letting his wife talk to her that way. That’d be the day that I’m not allowed into one of my kids’ homes because “they aren’t expecting company.” Gods. I’m not an impromptu “popper,” so I’m not too worried about this… but still! Can you imagine?
What else? Oh, I watched the first episode of Downton Abbey on the Kindle Fire and have to tell you that I am really impressed with the picture quality. Then yesterday, since Melody was playing the Wii, I had her leave it hooked up so I could watch more (we have to switch plugs from dvr to Wii and I can never remember the order, but she does!). I ended up watching 6 episodes from season 1 on Netflix, and I am liking it. Thanks to Shelly and everyone else who told me to watch. I do love the British dramas. How great is Maggie Smith? Ha! And don’t you hate Thomas? OK. that’s all I’ll say for now 
Speaking of Brits…I only watched the first hour of the Globes. I really don’t care for Ricky Gervais. Bleh. I wanted to see Peter Dinklage, and am so glad he won as best Supporting actor for Game of Thrones. I LOVE him as Tyrion. Perfect! I also think it’s great the Jessica Lange won for American Horror Story because I adore her. She’s at her best as a crazy southern woman, isn’t she? I know! And even Idris Elba won for Luther! If you haven’t seen that, you should. It’s a BBC America show – dirty cops, murder, that kind of thing.
Something very rare happened today: Melody pulled out a loose tooth. Seriously. I mean, she had to have the one that had been loose for no less than 18 months (and had a full grown tooth behind it) pulled (nudged, really) by the dentist, so I can’t believe she pulled this one out. She said she woke up and it felt like it was hanging down so she just pulled it. Sometimes she surprises me.
I made it an entire week without the gluten, and will tell you that, based on my results, I’m going to try to keep gluten to a minimum in my diet, though I’m not going to give it up for good. Yesterday I had bread and didn’t really notice anything major, aside from some more stomach rumblings than usual. I won’t bore you with the details, but I can tell you that my Crohn’s symptoms did indeed lessen significantly by removing gluten. So. There’s that. This SCD diet that the doc recommends also want you to remove lactose and sucrose, but I don’t see that happening. I don’t drink a lot of milk, but I do like cheese. And sucrose? Hmmm. I can try to cut back on sugar, but I don’t see being able to eliminate it all together. We’ll see. I’m kind of bummed about the gluten thing. I’m going to try the rice pasta I bought tonight. Hopefully it won’t be gross.
I guess that’s about all I have to babble about today. Dave is back on nights all this week so I’ll be good and frazzled and crabby by next weekend. Good times!
Finished!
by Cetta on January 13th, 2012
The puzzle, not the gigantic book I’m reading (and reading and reading)
So now that I’ve taken the picture, I break it all back up and put it in the pile for the Easter Seals people to pick up. Melody thinks I should frame it and hang it. What do you do with puzzles once they’re done? Not like I’ll ever do it again, right?
It’s Friday the 13th. All the tv news is abuzz about the big ole winter storm watch we’re under until Sunday. Neither of these things deterred my daughter from heading out to drive across the friggin’ state to spend a weekend with her ex-roomie. And, at 10 AM she called to tell me that she was OK, but she was also stuck in a ditch on the side of the highway in the middle of nowhere. Damned kids. She got it pulled out and the car is apparently “ok but shaky.” She has arrived at her destination and tells me she is taking it to a mechanic that the insurance people recommended on Monday.
If it’s not one kid, it’s another.
CJ is officially moving out this weekend.
I’ve decided (after discussing with her psychologist) that we are going to consult a child psychiatrist to discuss our options regarding Melody’s ever-increasing anxiety. I don’t want to medicate her. Really. I also cannot bear the terrifying panic attacks she endures. So. I’m exploring the options. Cognitive Behavior Therapy is helping, but not as much as I’d like. I also only take her once a month, since that $30 copay may not seem like a lot until you look at the amount of time the members of this family spend in doctors’ offices. I’m not even kidding. Anyway. I haven’t discussed Melody’s recent issues in depth here because I don’t want any judgy mcjudgers out there (or, more specifically, a certain person in Iowa) using this information to hurt me. BUT. I’ve seen how much support and helpful advice is also given and received among this amazing group of women out there. And I’d like to hear from people who are dealing with similar issues. Gawd knows I’d thought I was a pro at this parenting thing, but this child is an entirely different type of creature. So. Go ahead. Hit me with it. Would you medicate your anxious/selectively mute/brilliant/OCD child?
What else? I’m so glad to hear that people are watching Revenge! I just love how bitchy Madeline Stowe is. Now. Tell me about this Downtown Abbey thing. I don’t see it on BBC America, so where are you watching it? I know I can get the first season on Netflix and think that I may just be watching that tomorrow, given the snow and all…
I have still not had a bite of gluten and, I have to tell you, I resent the hell out of every one of you having pizza or pasta or a sammich right now. Actually, it’s not too bad yet. I made myself some fried rice this afternoon. Eh. I need some good recipes is all. And motivation to cook. Right now I really want a damned Ritz cracker.
I am SO SICK of all of this Tim Tebow nonsense. WHY is this all over my Facebook page? I agree with Jane: God doesn’t care about who wins a damned football game. I’m also sick of these politicians who keep throwing Jesus in our faces. Sorry, Jesus has no place in politics. Rick Santorum can “be the Jesus candidate” all he wants, but that doesn’t mean he can make laws based on his belief that Jesus said he should. And also? Rick Santorum is just creepy. Not as creepy as Rick Perry, but still. Otherwise, I don’t care who wins the GOP votes because all this craziness is making it look good for us commie lefty socialist liberals. Right? Right.
Computer woes…or something.
by Cetta on January 11th, 2012
You know what I love about my fancy-schmancy Kindle Fire? Well, I love lots, but I love this feature called “pulse.” It let me import feeds from my favorite blogs (oh, you know who you are! If you’re reading this, you’re probably on that list.) Anyhoo, so I can keep up with everyone without dragging my laptop over and turning it on and waiting for things to load… heh. First world problems, right? I also love how it automatically syncs to the latest page read on my regular kindle, which I keep in the bedroom. I almost feel guilty reading that, but… no. I like having them both, so there.
Dave’s PC but the big one today but thank GAWD he miraculously found the receipt AND we bought the extended warranty. Seems they have to ship it back to HP, bit at least it’s covered. This means, however, that the brat wants to use my laptop for things like Webkinz and poptropica and whatever. Bleh.
I have had the worst nausea all day today, which — is there anything worse than nausea? Because I’d rather have pain than nausea. Just sayin’. Hence, I didn’t do much today besides laundry, which I tend to do every day. These people use towels like they were in a hotel.
CJ and the putz went to get the oven today, which Dave planned to hook up for him tomorrow. Then he (CJ) texted me to tell me that apparently his father was hooking it up. I immediately took this for what it was: some macho pissing contest thing. Whatever. I told CJ to make sure the man knew what he was doing because a) besides drinking and sitting in his recliner, there’s not much the man DOES and 2) we never had a gas stove while we were married. So, a few hours later CJ calls to tell me that – long story short – he’d like Dave to come hook it up tomorrow. Oh, how I love being vindicated. And then, THEN, he later texts me to say, “Oh and Dad said to tell you that he hooked up your mom’s water heater when you were dating.” Really? He is so shamed that I was RIGHT and he couldn’t hook up a gas stove that he wanted CJ to text me to remind me of something he did in 1983?! And not alone, either. I believe he made my point for me.
Are y’all watching Revenge? Add this show to my guilty pleasures (along with Vampire Diaries) because it’s sooo soap-opera-y and bad that I like it. And Justified is coming back soon. I do love me some Timothy Olyphant. You know it. Oh! And Harry Connick, Jr. is doing a 4-show arc on SVU!!
I continue to read (and read and read and read) the third Game of Thrones. Somehow I’m only at 23%. Holy long-winded-ness! I do love it, though. I can’t get enough of the Imp.
OK. Enough of this. I wanted to get my bitchy rant off the front. What tv show is your guilty pleasure? Gluten-free, day 3. Is this why I’m nauseous? Hmm…
I’ll leave you with this rare picture of Melody sleeping. This was taken New Year’s Day… Porky is so sweet.
Warning: bitching ahead
by Cetta on January 10th, 2012
Gluten-free: day 2. Whoo! Or something.
I’m trying to get the hang of it. I bought a few things, like some rice pasta and corn tortillas. Christ, but the flour substitutes out there are expensive. $9 for a little bag of Xanthum Gum or Rice Flour or whatever. I’m going to hold off on that stuff for right now. When I start craving bread or something, I’ll think about it. Tonight I am making tacos and will either use the corn tortillas or just crush up a hard corn shell on some of the fixings.
CJ & Megan’s house closed yesterday, so my baby boy is officially moving out this weekend. I can’t tell you how old I feel.
I’ve been so tired. I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole idea of “invisible illnesses” and how, you know, “you don’t look sick” is what people think. When someone says something like, “I wish I had the time to … (read, knit, whatever,) I feel like they’re saying I’m lazy, or judging me for not working. Things like this really fuck with your head. I spent all day yesterday hooked up to an IV so that maybe I won’t feel awful for the next 6 weeks, but it’s not like people know or think about things like that. I run around doing the shopping or whatever and try to get it all done in one day because I know that the next day I will be worthless. I feel guilty that I’m home but I don’t keep up with the housework often. I keep up with the laundry and generally take care of whatever Melody needs and am exhausted doing it. It sucks. I don’t know what I’m saying. Just think before you speak, I guess. I’m as judgmental as the next person, I just have the benefit of knowing what chronic, “invisible” illness feels like.
We had an incident this weekend in which Spike jumped up at Melody and somehow hit her in the eye, bursting some blood vessels. The panic attack that ensued was beyond description. Because she was so freaked, I figured we needed to make sure her eye wasn’t scratched. Getting her to allow the doctor to even just shine a light in her eye was one (long difficult) thing, but when the doctor suggested an eye drop so they could see if there was a tear — you can’t imagine the scene. She was trying to climb over the bedrails, grabbing me, looking into my eyes with such fear and repeating, “Please, NO! Please NO” over and over. She was shaking, hyperventilating… it was worse than the dentist. The rude doctor actually rolled her eyes at me and said, “You are the adult.” Fuck you, lady. As the adult, I decided that since the ointment they were giving us was all they would do if it was scratched, we’d skip the dye test.
Needless to say, I was a mess after all this. She’s doing OK now, but her eye is still red and gross. She’s putting the ointment in herself, though I doubt much is actually getting into her eye. I left a message yesterday with her therapist because I feel like I need more help than she is giving. I am the one who has to deal with these panic attacks, and it’s not easy. It’s not a phase. I need to take care of my kid, you know? I hate that she’s so fearful and stubborn and … and it’s hard to explain to people who think that she just needs “a firm hand” or whatever. Gah.
How fun is this entry? Gotta make the tacos…
Is it Thursday?
by Cetta on January 5th, 2012
How cute is this Pooh & Piglet that I received from Dave?
Yes, yes, I do collect Winnie the Pooh stuff… mostly Classic Pooh, but I have some “modern” dust-collectors, too. This is also why I was AGHAST when I realized that no one bought me the new Pooh movie for Christmas! I used some of my Amazon bucks and bought it. Eh. I wasn’t impressed, though there’s something about Zooey Deschanel’s voice (she sings most of the songs) that I really like. I can’t put my finger on what I didn’t like about it – I think I just really, really like the original stories.
While I was ordering that, I also bought the Diane Keaton autobiography. I’ve always liked her, and the reviews of the book are intriguing. I figured the hardcover was only a few bucks more than the Kindle edition, so what the hell. Plus, Kindle doesn’t always include all of the photos, which are important in a biography, right? I mean, I read Patti Smith’s book on Kindle (it’s excellent and if you have even a passing interest of the music and art scene in NYC in the 70s, you will like it) and was pissy to find out that the hardcover had so many more pictures. I went to the library just to flip through the book and see what I missed. Where was I going with this? Oh…Diane Keaton. I’ll read it after I finish the new book on Jack Kennedy I’m slowly reading. I like to have a fiction and nonfiction going at the same time. I’m still loving the Game of Thrones series (on book 3 now) but GAWD, these books are HUGE. If I were not reading them on the Kindle, I think the sheer size would discourage me.
***
I know some of you have experience going gluten-free and boy, do I need help! I’m looking at recipes and seeing things like amaranth and sorghum and I’m thinking UGH! I did see that Bisquick makes a gluten-free, so that might work for some things. I’ve got holds in at the library for some books, too. I need to buckle down and prepare. I am so, so bad at planning meals ahead. I admire those moms who can plan out weeks and then shop for exactly what they need. I think my brain is just not wired to be that damned organized. I start out with good intentions and then… oooo, shiny! In the interest of taking control of my health (and in hopes of lessening my pain, definitely), I am going to do all I can to eliminate gluten. I’m also taking my damned prescription iron pills – well, one a day, anyway – since I discovered that taking an anti-nausea with it helps. I’m now an expert at giving myself B-12 shots, too. Whoo!
***
I don’t know if any of you read Monica’s blog (you should) but yesterday she and Serge lost everything they owned in a house fire. They are fine, thank god, but… I can’t imagine the heartbreak they’re going through. Poor Monica wrote about losing all of her journals, pictures, etc. They have two gorgeous babies and need our help. I know the blogging community can be amazing in times like these, so if you have a spare ten bucks, consider donating. Katie has set up a fund for them here.
The Bielankos.
Update: wow! They’ve already raised the $10K they were looking for!
***
Today was another low-key day of puzzling, etc. I’m worried that Spike is getting sick again, but he’s eating fine. He just seems a little off – and constantly wants to be ON me, like he was a cat or something. Maybe I’m just worrying for nothing. God knows we can’t afford any more vet bills!
Morning mind dump
by Cetta on January 4th, 2012
My new Buddha
Isn’t it lovely? It’s one of the gifts I received from Dave. Just looking at it is calming. One of my “resolutions” is to take some time each day to stop and just be.
I don’t really make resolutions. I mean, I’m forever MAKING them, it’s the keeping that I seem to lose track of. So. Things I want to do this year:
- Be more patient and supportive.
- Eat better/Make a real effort at the SCD diet (to help Crohn’s).
- Write more, here and on paper
- Be a better, more communicative friend.
- Simplify.
How about you? Do you make resolutions or just make lists, like me?
***
We broke with tradition this year and let Mel have a sleepover on New Year’s Eve. Instead of sitting at the table playing board games, we watched these goofy girls playing Just Dance and Wipeout and doing their nails… for me, it was more fun and relaxing. They made it to midnight, of course. And then Melody had her “OMG it’s past midnight and I’ll never sleep again” panic attack. Sigh. She’ll grow out of these things, I keep telling myself. They were up bright and early, though, and dressed alike:
They’re laughing because they’re standing over the heat vent, which is blowing up their shirts.
***
I’m working on a crochet ripple blanket that I think is for CJ & Megan. Did I tell you they bought a house (knock wood, it hasn’t closed yet)? Yes. They did. It’s nice, a good start for them, I think. I worry – as usual – about everything that is involved in this, but my mantra is “he’s a grown man, now. He’s not your baby boy anymore.” It’s not easy, people. I understand how this works and I know that my position as #1 female in his life has been usurped – and I don’t even begrudge Megan that! – but I still see this when I look at him:
Look how young I am! Ha!
So. There’s that.
When he does move out, we’ll move Cailey into his room, leaving Melody with her own room once again, a thing Melody likes and dislikes. Cailey is looking forward to it, though, as you can imagine. I am looking forward to not hearing them fight over whatever stupid shit they fight over concerning whose room it is.
***
Melody is finally back at school today. Hear that? Nothing but Pug Snores. Ahhhh.
***
Disclaimer: if you know me, you know how passionate I can be about politics. Last night, with the Iowa Caucuses, the Republican campaign began in earnest. If you don’t like politics, or don’t like MY politics, feel free to skim. I’ll forgive you.
Rick Santorum, huh? It’s funny and frightening at the same time. I don’t think he’ll be the nominee, of course, but who’d have thought? I cannot WAIT to see what jon Stewart has to say tonight.
Newt Gingrich: Have you ever seen a more petulant, bitter, man-child? Good GOD. And you think Al Gore was mental claiming to have help “invent the internet” – listen to this guy and you’ll think he was behind every damn thing that was good in government for the last 25 years. Nevermind that he had millions in ethics violations and that whole leaving-your-wife-on-her-deathbed to marry your mistress thing.
Hopefully Perry drops out today and I think Bachman will, too. I almost feel sorry for her since she tried so hard. She’s batshit crazy, but she worked hard.
And that’s my politics for today.
***
We took down the tree and all of the Xmas paraphernalia (gods, we have a lot of Xmas shit) and set up a table in that corner with my nifty new puzzle keeper and the old rocker that was my mom’s. I worked on this puzzle for a long time yesterday. I know this because my ass hurts. I need new cushions or something for that chair.
***
I saw on Cybele’s blog this idea about a perpetual journal: you write one line a day and at the end of the year you go back to the first page and start over again. So the first page in my journal says “january 1″ and then the entry is “2012 – whatever I write that day”. Get it? I’m not explaining it well, but it’s a cool idea and one I can (hopefully stick to.
Do you journal on paper, too? Before computers, I did. Since the blog, not too much. I like the feedback I get from the blog. The more private stuff, of course, I usually type and save in some random file on the laptop. Every once in a while I go through and delete these rants.
OK. Enough for today. Be happy!
